8 things that shouldn’t make parents feel guilty
Feelings of guilt are the daily companion of many parents. They want to do everything right and often put themselves under enormous pressure, because they are told from all sides how to be a mother and father and how to behave in certain situations.
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If this idea does not fit into the reality of life at all, the guilty conscience quickly stirs. But especially in the 8 following situations, parents should be more relaxed:
1. Too much time in front of the screen
In times of home office and home schooling, it is sometimes not easy to reconcile children and work. Tablets, cell phones, televisions and the like can become lifesavers and you should just ignore all five when it comes to how much time the children spend in front of the screen. Besides, it always depends on what the kids are watching or playing.
2. Pizza, nuggets and Co.
Children should have a balanced diet, no question about it. However, if nuggets, french fries or frozen pizza are used in stressful times because there is not enough time to cook, parents should not let themselves feel guilty. At the weekend there is enough time again to cook in a balanced and healthy way. And you can give the little ones vegetables or offer them healthy snacks in between.
3. Lots of grumbling
The children are bored and frustrated, the parents stressed and overwhelmed. This can quickly lead to complaints on both sides. The current Corona situation is not easy for everyone, but complaining does not help much. And feel guilty even less. It is better to breathe in and out deeply, say stop and then react. Or take regular breaks or just drive into a forest and scream.
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4. Later bed times
A structured everyday life is important for children, even in times of pandemic. But right now, many families find it particularly difficult to find a rhythm. Especially in the evening it is more common for children to go to bed later than usual. Instead of stressing out or feeling guilty, parents should relax. There are other times as well.
5. Too little playing and handicrafts together
Children love to play. Adults less. In addition to the home office and the daily cooking and tidying up, there is often not much time left to play extensively with the children or to do something together. Try not to feel guilty about it. It also encourages your child’s independence and imagination when they have to do something on their own. And on the weekend they play together for as long as the youngsters want.
6. A messy apartment
Does your apartment always have to be tidy and tidy? Certainly, a certain degree of cleanliness should exist in the kitchen and bathroom, but stressing yourself out about it is wrong. Much more important are the moments that you spend with your partner, your children or your friends. Right now it is important to keep reminding yourself and to enjoy the time when you read a book together, play something or cook together.
Every parenting guide says parents should be consistent in their dealings with their children. But probably every parent knows that a no with a little persuasion can quickly turn into a yes. And why not? Parents are only human too. Much more important than always being consistent, it is after all to communicate with your children on an equal footing. So take it easy and relax if you couldn’t resist your child’s pleading eyes.
8. Let the child sleep in their own bed
Many parents do not want their child to sleep in bed with them because they think it will spoil their child too much. But secretly there is nothing better for many mothers than holding their child’s hand at night or waking up in the morning and watching him sleep. So just leave out feelings of guilt and enjoy, as long as the offspring is still pounding into their parents’ bed at night.
Again, there was only frozen pizza, instead of reading in the evening just a radio play and there wasn’t enough time for playing with your child? So what? Parents also need a break from time to time, don’t feel like it or simply don’t have the time. The current circumstances demand a lot from them. And even if certain things are important, guilt shouldn’t degrade yourself to a bad parent. This does not only apply in the currently difficult situation, but actually always.
The following articles provide helpful tips and tricks for everyday life with children:
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